How Brian Davies Redefined His Purpose through Severe Health Challenges and Played for the USA Amputee Hockey Team

Speaker 1

00:00

 This episode is sponsored by the Integrity income fund, which is managed by yours truly and my team at Labrador lending, the Integrity income fund is for accredited investors. It aims to pay an eight percent preferred return and an 8.5% preferred return for early investors. It aims to pay out monthly distributions. There's a 25 thousand dollar minimum and only a one-year lockup. If you are an accredited investor and you're looking to get away from Wall Street, looking to beat inflation and looking for an asset class that is backed by hard physical real estate then look no further than Integrity income fund, check it out at Labrador Lending.com. In this episode I got the chance to chat with Brian Davies. Brian. And I went to the same high school. He's a little bit younger than I am but his life took a serious unexpected turn with extreme health challenges after college. Brian is a former Collegiate athlete. Who was always an extremely hardworking person and just as he's settling into his professional career thinking. Okay, I can live a comfortable life and kind of do this job thing and things are somewhat on. Autopilot, he got challenged, he got challenged through some real extreme. Health obstacles if you will and eventually ended up losing part of his leg and losing an organ again, serious health challenges and the big. It sounds like the biggest hardship really was the mental side of things and how he was isolated. When others, his friends are all working, professional jobs and maybe people are just starting families, and he's at home taking pills and you know left with his thoughts. And, so I think that's a big, you know big clearly was a huge struggle for him. One of the key takeaways for me from this episode was how his father was able to redirect Brian's perspective and when Brian said hey Dad you know why me? Why is this happening to me in Bryan was kind of at probably as low as Point? His dad said you're asking the wrong question you know who would you want this to happen to instead of you? It's not Why me? It's what do you what are you going to do about it? And Brian has also worked through how he's reached. He's changed how he defines purpose, and how he defines goals. And, you know, he shifted his Focus to others and that was a big way that he was able to get through this mentally. He was able to get a master’s degree from Johns Hopkins. He was able to travel and make the team for the Team USA. UT hockey team and I mean it just phenomenal accomplishments for someone that's been through so much. So this one is really inspiring. I know you're going to like it, inspiring stories of real people overcoming incredible odds to live life to the fullest. We are all guaranteed to face. Hardships, how will we handle the adversity? Join us to be moved by every day, people who have turned poverty into prosperity and weakness into wealth Be Inspired as the he's relatable Heroes, get vulnerable and former counterintelligence investigator Jamie Bateman puts his interviewing skills to the test, restore your faith in humanity as you experience. True Cinderella stories of average people turning surreal struggle and deep despair into booming, businesses and financial Fortune. Take ownership of the life. You are destined to live.

Speaker 2

03:59

 And turn your adversity into.

Speaker 1

04:01

 Abundance. Welcome everybody, to another episode of the, from adversity, to abundance podcast. I am your host Jamie Bateman. And today, I am excited to be joined by a special guest Brian Davies. Brian, how are you doing today?

Speaker 2

04:18

 Doing very well. Thanks for having me.

Speaker 1

04:20

 Absolutely, thanks for taking the time, we appreciate it. So, for a little bit of context before you provide much more context, Brian, and I went to the same high school, and so Brian you were you're a little bit younger than me and good friends. With both of my brothers and played Sports all through and through high school, and we will get into that. So for the listeners out there, who are you and kind of, what are you up to today?

Speaker 2

04:48

 Yeah, so I have the past five years, I have been moving around a little bit left, Maryland and did decide to change my career and went to Boston decide. I wanted to work. On planes, the rest of my life. Okay, so I went from a high school teacher to acquisition for aircraft and then kind of the world took me back. I never thought I would be coming back to the Mid-Atlantic and now I am here in Virginia enjoying the finer Summers of Virginia.

Speaker 1

05:22

 Provide, it's been a little cooler, the last at least in Maryland the last few days but how long were you in Boston? For just curious three.

Speaker 2

05:31

 Years. Okay. And then I said it was a wonderful. The only time I had ever been there for one day to play UMass. When I was in college, I would never go back and then I spent three great years. They're transforming my career.

Speaker 1

05:47

 Okay, that's pretty cool. Yeah, we took the kids up there. I think it was summer 2019, so pre-pandemic for four days you know in the summer it was so much better than I thought. It was going to be. It was amazing. It was so walkable is, I mean, I think a lot of it depends on the weather obviously, but yeah, it was a fantastic City to check out but so that's good context for today. But obviously the meat of what we want to get into is centered around, mostly the adversity that you have been through with some health struggles. And you know, and then how you were able to overcome that, and one of the things I want to just reiterate And I have said this on other episodes, but you know, we don't, we don't act like, you know, Brian, you went through some adversity. Now, you don't have any adversity and now you live in abundance entirely and, you know, it's not like that but I think we can look back on some serious struggles that people have gone through and you certainly have gone through some real challenges and, you know, pull out some lessons learned from And the whole intent of the show is to inspire people and to help them understand that, you know, they're not alone in the fact that they're going through a hard time and that they can get through it, over it around it whatever and get to kind of the mental whatever that looks like for that person but abundance whether its Financial physical, you know, all the above. But yeah. So if you could for The listeners can set the stage a little bit. I know you were like I said we played Sports and I remember you from playing basketball and my brother would say just what a hard worker you were and just I mean, yeah, I just remember a very positive hard work, you know, work ethic and positive person. So you know, unfortunately, your situation took a turn that we're going to get. To set the stage for so you can start wherever you'd like as far as high school college or but just go from there if you would.

Speaker 2

08:10

 Yeah. Absolutely. And again, thanks everybody for tuning into this. So I go back to my days, you know, as my dad would like to say, I was never good at doing anything the first time, so I generally put my head down and just kept working through everything that I have done. It's not a, it's not a natural ability. Atia. It's just an as he might would. He might say, like, stubbornness to want to be better at something. And in what I expected of myself and that kind of parlayed throughout my high school career, you know, playing sports with the batemans. Everybody that, you know, I was the guy off the bench. I was never the first person that you called upon, but I knew it would take work. Not where I wanted to be. I wanted to be someone that my friends and my teammates relied on but wasn't solely focused on one thing. So you know, my life in growing up was I you know, I would go. It was never in the house. So I was out with friends, skateboarding out with other friends. Just hanging out, I was with my friends, playing sports being from Philadelphia and then moving the Maryland pickup basketball was a wonderful thing. Just that ability to be outside and do things and kind of see where I was measured up against other. People meant a lot to me because I knew I needed to when I wear and when I needed to work and how hard I needed to do it? I actually remember it's one playing in High School, lacrosse, that's really changed. Everything. We are on a Faceoff after the other team scored, and I am on the wing of the field. And as The faceoffs Happening, the balls free, and I am running next to somebody. And I just took off and I got the ball, and we went down, and we actually had a fast break and scored and I realized what it took to be better. And then at parlay, this is my junior year of high school parlayed into playing lacrosse at UMBC, unfortunately. My senior year of high school. I broke my shoulder blade in half. So I have a metal plate across it. Which is ironically kind of the precursor to the rest of the next 20 years of my life finished up. When my High School coaches, went to coaching College, it was at a local school. I finished up there. Had a wonderful career was really looking forward to what was coming next. And I graduated in December 2003 and that's really where my story. The takes a turn. Yeah. I mean it goes wildly. Yeah other control from.

Speaker 1

11:11

 There. Not how you would have predicted it. I would imagine. So just now did you play what sports did you play lacrosse and college? You did right? I did is at UMBC. And then somewhere else Stephenson and was that the one you didn't play basketball in college?

Speaker 2

11:30

 No, no. There was only Why I find it funny story connected to the batemans that Josh and Rob convinced I would have never played lacrosse again in Josh and Rob convinced me to play nice. Okay. And that sport took over my life.

Speaker 1

11:47

 Yeah, it's an awesome sport. I mean, we're big lacrosse family so that's, you know, guilty as charged here. But it's a fun, fun sport. So you gotta, you got out of college. And then what?

Speaker 2

12:03

 And so December 2003, I graduated, and I had already been working a full-time job. My last semester and was kind of really looking forward. I was working in a business inanity of Zurich Insurance. That my dad kind of helped me get into and you know, I saw a lot of my future just like he did, you know he did well and I could be a growing professional and I could go out on Friday. Nights with my friends and really be that working-class life that we have here in Baltimore.

Speaker 1

12:42

 Comfortable. I mean you know secure comfortable. Yeah. Good. The good life right? Yeah.

Speaker 2

12:48

 Just the building blocks to getting you know to being that they could adult theater for.

Speaker 1

12:54

 Say. Yeah.

Speaker 2

12:55

 And I had a small cyst cut out of my back March. 2004 and what it did is it triggered? A hereditary illness, everybody effectually knows it all sort of colitis and when it triggered, it immediately was out of control for the next six months. I lost, I was 200 pounds and, you know, well, build athlete and I went down to and 40. Wow, my skin was just pale and just sickly and my endurance. I loved running. Running was always my favorite thing to do. I couldn't make it more than a The quarter mile without starting to just be in agony. And so from March to that Thanksgiving break, I just started a career as a teacher was really excited about it and my, my health was getting worse and worse. I couldn't make it through 50 minutes of my class period without feeling ill, and they finally diagnosed it being all sort of colitis. But what they didn't realize and it only came out the next two months is that I had an infection c-diff under it. So at that point, I was taking I would wake up in the morning and take 45 pills to try to control the colitis and because of the infection, it didn't there was it didn't do anything. It was every, every bit of medicine was just irrelevant. Well. And so I still don't. Time, I actually still felt manageable was when I would try to run and I would try to work out and it was just getting worse and worse. And finally, so January 2005, I go to the doctor and say, Doc, I am it feels like fires. Going up my leg, and he grabs my foot, and he looks at it, and he has his very quizzical look. And he goes Brian. You're a diabetic. You have you're taking all this medicine, it's neuropathy, don't worry about it. So two weeks after that, they give me a medicine to try to control the colitis. This is, this is just before Valentine's Day and I remember it. I am going to parent-teacher conference, I go home. I put this medicine. I take this medicine. And it feels like concrete's going through my.

Speaker 1

15:52

 System. So just to back up for a split-second. So the medicine is this medicine is for neuropathy, is that there's, this is for the colitis, okay? So same medicine or, you know, similar medicine that you have been taking for quite some time. Not a new medicine at this.

Speaker 2

16:10

 Point. This one, this one was the new medicine. Okay. All right. It will last it lasted for 24 hours.

Speaker 1

16:17

 Okay? Okay, all right. So but it was to deal with the colitis and new medicine. Okay, got it understood. All right.

Speaker 2

16:26

 And so from there I went into the hospital and the surfer. A series of I would be in the hospital for a week out of the hospital for a week and the stories of the day to day is just an absolute struggle. I mean, I was bedridden. Life is going on my favorite season spring is happening. I am supposed to be coaching lacrosse. Was you know, doing my high school history teacher thing in coaching and the things I wanted to do in life. And I had this, I had to go up to the principal and say, I, the doctor said, I can't finish the year. And so now, I was even more isolated, because now the people that I could kind of talk to about this, we're gone. My friends that I worked with were there. They And I was a burden to them because now I am giving them work to.

Speaker 1

17:23

 Do in my oblems. Yeah, gotcha. Yeah. That's I mean, and this is one of the risks with, you know, doing a podcast like this. To be honest. Is it glosses. It's very easy to gloss over it. Yeah. Oh, well, he had some hard days or whatever and it's like now this was many, many hours and days and weeks and months and I mean again I didn't go through it but it's just you know it's hard to kind of put that in context fully for about what you went through, and we have had some similar episodes. One is not act. 1 is going to be out in a few days as of today, but we're just I mean yeah hospital and all kinds of health challenges and it's you know I just I don't want the it to come across like we're just tell ya that was he had a hard time for a couple days there but Okay. So, and then, and I remember because I did watch your Ted Talk that's I recommend the listeners watch as well on YouTube, and you talked about, and I think you're going to get into this. But the, you know, the, it's not just a physical challenge here, you just started to touch on it. You were very isolated and becoming, or at least you saw it as you were becoming a burden to people. It seems like I don't want to put Words in your mouth. But yeah, touch dive into that a little bit more.

Speaker 2

18:53

 Absolutely. And this, and this is where it becomes really. The mental anguish was more and more difficult. So the day before, the Easter Eve, I went to sleep. Didn't think any, you know just like a normal day of struggling as all of them had been. And I woke up at 1:00 in the morning with a pain in my leg. That was the most pain I have ever been in my life, and I am shaking uncontrollably. Water sweating out of it, just pouring out of my body and for six hours, I tried to get help. I couldn't dial the phone. I could, I wasn't calm enough to walk anywhere, it was just an absolute struggle and the only way I thought I could get help, and I am the idiot in me through a Freely, admit would call my dad for help, and he drives over. He takes me to the hospital. And I remember going back when they went to check me in, they look at me and I will never repeat what I said because it's profanity-laced. But the pain was so bad that they just wheeled me right to the back. And I remember just being by myself, and they look in 15 seconds, If they take a Doppler on my leg and C5 blood clots over my right ankle. So they know what the issue is and it's 6:00 in the morning. So I had made it five six hours without any just trying to get help. God help. And now I am by myself, I don't know how to control it. I can at this point, I realize that my mental ability to just put my head down and keep pushing wasn't working.

Speaker 1

20:47

 That's not helpful. Let us not going to do it the way you'd relied on for all those years to get through, you know, difficult times was to put your head down and work harder, right? Yeah. And that's not going to do it.

Speaker 2

21:00

 Here. Yeah. Literal literally and figuratively running through every obstacle I could, and I couldn't stand up on my, I couldn't stand up. So, for the next five weeks, and this is always made me feel terrible. That there were Surgeries to try to open up the blood clot and in that none of them worked and you can actually see on my toes. They were becoming black and nude, which is gangrenous. So gangrene had set in and it was growing and you can see it coming up my leg. And I remember, I was at my sister's graduation from James Madison, I couldn't put my foot down, and I had a soft You know, like a slipper you wear around the house and I they were worried about where I was, and I am looking around at this whole party. I am like, I can't, I am not one of you. I am out of, I am not in this sphere, and it felt everything became more and more isolating. And then I remember the doctor we go in the last time to the doctor before I had the last surgery. And it was one of the last times. I remember reaching back to two friends in a way that was the way I used to be very open and talking to people and not feeling so isolated, because being in the hospital, you can't help but feel isolated from reality and when I was there, the doctor comes in, it's a Monday mid-may, and he goes, Brian in 24. You have to tell me how much of your leg do you want to lose? The? Clots were moving. Everything was just is getting. You can see the gangrene just keep moving up and I asked him for 10 minutes. Talk to my dad, let us talk to my dad for a minute and I called Good friend of mine mad. He's a he's in the area still wonderful guy, and he was getting married in three weeks. And I said, buddy, I promise you, I walk down the aisle at the wedding, I promise you and 24 hours later. I woke up with my leg sleeps. Five inches below my knee. My right ankle amputated. And I will forever remember that moment. Because not because of the amputation because when the nurse came over, she went to place something down. Where my leg used to be and I started screaming like someone was hurting me and just how my mind had warped into protecting that area and eliminating everything around me really, was transfer. It transcended, what was actually happening to me? And really was the mental battle that I was about to go under for the next 15 years of my.

Speaker 1

24:14

 Life. So just so everything seemed like a threat physically, like, you just want to keep everything.

Speaker 2

24:21

 All right way. Yeah, I wouldn't let anyone touch it. I remember the doctor went on rapid one time and I swung Adam. And even though I did it, I just it was so everything about that area. My whole life centered around my leg. The rest of my body was irrelevant. It just had to make sure that my leg didn't hurt or nobody made it her worse at a during the course of those surgeries. I slept for 45 minutes a day, I would be up from 5 AM to 5:45 and when the birds would chirp in the morning I would be up and I have a lot of energies. So when I couldn't expend it I couldn't go to sleep now. I was bedridden and.

Speaker 1

25:06

 It was over you at this point 2424. I mean, that is. I mean, there's there are no words. That's just, that's it sucks. I mean, it's just awful and this started because of the removal of the cyst. I mean. Yep.

Speaker 2

25:27

 It was, it was a really mundane my sister had the same cyst removed when hmm. Evidently I think it's like words of my math could be wrong, but they said like 50 to 60 percent of people have this. Some people just need to get it cut out. It's a pollen Idol cyst and it just triggered. It was the triggering event to well, do immune illnesses to kick on.

Speaker 1

25:57

 She's I mean I you know I appreciate you being so open and sharing about it. So and then okay then you had your ankle and a good part of your lower leg removed and then so what talk us through what you're going through mentally at that.

Speaker 2

26:15

 Point, so I the I kind of go back. I always go back to when I am when I need to do something. I just put my head down, figure out the next step and just kind of go and it took me a little bit to figure out what I need to do in order to the first one was just to get out of the rehab facility, they said you needed to be better at doing this, you know, x y and z. Z better. You have to show them that you can get around your house and not be a detriment to yourself. So, I was doing all the exercises is actually Memorial weekend. I remember watching Johns, Hopkins, win their Championship from a bed in the hospital. And I just remember going, I got to get out of here and my good friends. My good friend Todd and Chris showed up too just to see how I was doing. And I had tried to walk out of the complex. I was so physically, just malnourished and I hadn't been outside in three months that I made it to this little, this little bench outside, and I couldn't move in tide actually went and picked up the wheelchair, from inside, to get me back inside. And, you know, we're kidding around and paddling around. But I remember being in at that, Facility, and they do great things. But for me, mentally, it was the worst place I could ever be. Because I was, I was proving a point. In my mind that I was going to be different from everybody for the rest of my life. In the more, I couldn't interact with my friends, the more I lost touch with the fact that they still saw me as Brian but I didn't see myself as Brian. Hmm. So without kind of that back and forth with them socially, I was losing, I was losing Touch of what it meant to really be a, an interactive person, and living.

Speaker 1

28:26

 Life, and they were losing touch of the changes that had been occurring to you. I would guess, you know, it's.

Speaker 2

28:33

 Like, yeah, I remember what I remember. One of them took me out. Not long. After this all had happened, it's all the friend from high school, and they turned to me, and they go I thought you were dead. Like I heard that story and I go, you know at that point I was doing a little bit better as a will certainly felt like it.

Speaker 1

28:57

 Right, right? But it.

Speaker 2

29:00

 Really went to the fact that I lost a year of being for some people. I had been friends with you know growing up for almost my whole school career, I had lost complete touch with and some of them, I Wish them well in the world, but they, we don't exist as friends anymore because that disconnection from that.

Speaker 1

29:23

 Point. Yeah. I mean, I think that happens to all of us. But I mean, in your, in your case, it's a little more extreme and, you know, there's a lot, a lot more Dynamics, and nuances to it's a little more complicated, but so, and in your talk, you gave you, you spoke about the Kind of the, I guess the disappointment you had with your friend's wedding and what that meant. And you know, let us get onto that. As far as the, your, you know, the changes you have made mentally in the lessons. You have learned about goal setting and those kinds of things.

Speaker 2

30:02

 Absolutely. I so that friend that I called, Matt, his wedding really meant a lot to me. It was a, it was the first time in many, many months. And I have always been a Very goal-oriented, push towards those goals. And then, once I hit it, there's another one. And that was the first call. I re-established for myself, since being sick. It was, I had three weeks from the time. I lost my leg to be ready to walk down the aisle at that wedding, and I remember just as the, in those three weeks is every day, got closer. I got a little bit more worried that I wouldn't even be able to have the attempt to lock. Okay. And the week of the wedding, Matt, Matt, and I have been talking and said, bloody, I am going to get there. Just, I don't want you to worry, I will get there and my dad really helped. My family has helped me get all the things I needed to. And the first day I got a leg was the day before his wedding, it was the day of his is dress rehearsal. And I thought I could just go ahead and walk which was part of my I mean my ignorance is that because I think I can do it when the reality was that I really couldn't. But I remember getting that leg and walking in my dad was here, and we're on 28th Street down in Baltimore and I cry. The first steps I walked. I cried so hard. And I, I knew I could give myself a chance to do to walk down the aisle to wedding. And as we're getting there, and I am like, trying to do without crutches, there is no way. I am going to be able to walk in the me crutches. Weren't assistants that I You know, I was Veena Millie against and after talking the mad, right? As we're leading up to the wedding, he's like, listen, Brian use the crutches. It's gonna be a long day. You haven't been out like this in a long time. It's not a big deal. The wedding happens. It's a great time. I got to dance with my date, who came with me, who was a longtime friend from hair for Tracy and for a minute and felt. Okay. But the next morning and the days that went on, I mean, as a teacher, you spend the summer, you know, doing other things, and I was sitting in my living room again by myself with nobody else around me. Because most of my friends are working, or they're doing family things or teachers, like they all had something to do. So there I am isolated again and I tried to start setting more goals, but in the back of my head, I failed at walking down the aisle to wedding in to me that failure. Was it was, it was something I couldn't accept. And I couldn't accept it also, because it was one of the closest people to me. And.

Speaker 1

33:18

 That and like you said it was your first goal. You'd set in quite some time since you deaf, you know. So it was it wasn't like it was one of 100 goals you said last week or whatever? It's a, it's a big one right in your mind. Yeah.

Speaker 2

33:33

 It's it was the goal. And, and I, and it took me a while and I started after the days that went on, I my mental state was just deteriorating rapidly. Lee, and I am not going to say, I was not suicidal. I wasn't in a state like that, but I equated to being on a roller coaster. In my emotions had built so much that I was at the very top of that roller coaster and when he went over the, you know, went down, I was going to take everything around me out, I didn't care if my house burned down. I mean care if I wreck something I did, I didn't have that care anymore and I sat at the house and I said, I got to the point where I called my dad and that poor guys trying to work, it's 11 o'clock on a Tuesday morning, and he's trying to do work, and I am screaming about just being upset and yours. Brian of all the people in the world who, you know who could you could take a problem like this on? Is there anybody else? You would even let that happen to you? And I said, no, I will take it 100% of the time.

Speaker 1

34:51

 Because you were thinking kind of like, why me?

Speaker 2

34:54

 Yeah. Oh yeah.

Speaker 1

34:55

 Yeah. I mean I am not I can imagine, right? I am just trying to set the stage you're thinking, why is this all happening to me? Yeah. And then you asked and then I think you said in your talk that he said that's the wrong question. Yeah. Who is it? Who would you give this to her something?

Speaker 2

35:15

 Yeah. He said, what are you gonna do about Yeah, second question. Yeah, and such and it just clicked and for all the people that had spent all of that time making sure I was okay. I mean, those people are there officially in the world friends, but their family and I remember talking to my dad and I hung up the phone with them. Damn, well, we talked later and I said it. Demoman. I decided I couldn't be average. I looked at it being not being unique is something — when all of a sudden being unique, could be something positive and there was the really, really was role reversal and what I was going to do with every one of those days was going to support the so infrastructure that I had my mom, my dad my sister her, my brother-in-law, my friend, Todd, my friend, met, my friend, Brad, my friend, Kevin, my friend, Jamie, my friend, Kenny my the list of people who have you fought with me through all of this and when that clicked and I realized that they had my back, I needed to set those goals and I needed to set them to be something much better than what. I just set the Goals, I set for myself, I had to be in some way. If I hit a goal, someone could take that part of that story in related to themselves.

Speaker 1

37:04

 Yeah, and so we are, you know, unfortunately, there's so much we have limited time, but, but the, I mean this and I mentioned to you before we hit record, this one of the themes of so far with my podcast and the show has been with people getting Through adversity, one of the big shifts has been mentally focusing on others and incorporating others into their, their kind of view and I hadn't heard it, you know, phrase the same way with regard to incorporating others into goal-setting and defining success, hadn't heard it until you. You're listening to your story, but it's a similar theme. I think coming through in these episodes. Is that look, it makes, I mean, of course, you have to be focused on yourself. Self when your, when your health is, is the number one concern, right? That's not a bad thing, of course. But at some point, if you're going to get past that and again, I haven't been in your shoes. I am just kind of looking at it from the outside, but that's, you know, you have got to focus on others and incorporate others and, and think bigger. And, you know, instead of just thinking about yourself, is that, is that fair to say, what?

Speaker 2

38:21

 I think most.

Speaker 1

38:23

 Most.

Speaker 2

38:23

 Of us humans. The worst critic I have is myself and if I can narrate and incorporate other people in its - - - you should have done better, you should have done it this way and when I thought I failed the walk down the aisle to wedding, Matt told me that he was proud of me and I go, it's awesome proud like How can I be proud of that? Yeah, I needed crutches and he goes. You gotta like yesterday this is perfect for her. So and once I realized to incorporate their input, of course, as a human, I want to do everything perfectly, but if I read, if I go back to what my dad's been saying about me my entire life, I have never done anything perfect. The first time that's guessing most people haven't either. But I did not really, not realistic view of how I did things. And I realized that my, the process to reaching all those goals that I set for myself, it didn't need to be perfect. But what I could control I needed to be out. I will put it this way, Barry Brown Lee, who was the principal and Archbishop curly. When I got the job, there had the most, the greatest advice I had ever heard. Given that anybody, he said, Brian and this is when I was sick too and I, we, he really didn't know it. Because Brian, I don't expect you to be perfect every day, but when you walk in here, if you're at 80%, give me all the lady.

Speaker 1

40:02

 That's really good.

Speaker 2

40:03

 That's awesome. So that kind of Became reflective and how I felt that day that if I couldn't walk because of the prosthetic was hurting and other leg was going to give, I was still going to give everything I could and then people's input was going to help me get to that goal.

Speaker 1

40:26

 Sure. So it sounds like and you know, there's obviously not it's a process, right? This whole thing is a long process, but it sounds like it took You took some time a long time to kind of, maybe forgive yourself for not having met that goal at your friend's wedding, about how much time was that, that we're talking about.

Speaker 2

40:46

 So that was probably about two months but I will tell you, I think about it every day.

Speaker 1

40:51

 Okay, gotcha, so now, and like I said, we're, we are unfortunately starting to run out of time here. But I and I don't want to, you know, most of this episode is going to be centered on your adversity, but we haven't even talked about You know, that the successes that you had, let us try to highlight some of those, you know, like I mean the hockey stuff is awesome. So if you could, you know fairly succinctly, hit some of the highlights and maybe one or two other kinds of lessons learned that the listeners could apply.

Speaker 2

41:29

 Absolutely through that process, the goal is just started growing in the multiple page. Ages of goals. I don't even write them down anymore because I just there's too many pages that he would take in 2010. An amputee in Army and Beauty down in not far from Baltimore. His story, got me to want to play hockey and this past year, I played against Canada, the Canadian team national team at an event with the Wounded Warriors, I have gotten to play against the Tampa Bay Lightning. I have gotten them sauce to go across the u.s., another one of my difficult stories was making the US team, but not being allowed on the plane because of my health. But I have also, I got, it helped me, focus and get my Master's Degree from Johns Hopkins, which I still think is one of the best required the best things I have ever done for myself. I have walked through the Great Wall of China, parts of it. I have biked through that. Alps, I have traveled to so many countries and the one I am probably most proud of because, you know, being a diabetic and being an amputee, got to spend some time in Afghanistan in something that I thought was near and dear to me, but some always been told no for both of those reasons and kind of the perseverance in the fight in like I told you before, fighting the Fight every day. Not being doing things the right way and following the process and listening to people. Hmm, I got to spend two weeks going around parts of the world that I had never seen. And in a normal circumstance and if it really, if it wasn't for my leg, I would never have seen. I never would be in the position to do these things. Yeah, and Team USA is the best one, you know, I thought I was a pretty good lacrosse. Player. And, you know, I had a pretty good ego when I played in college. But yeah. When the, the you Team USA says, you can put on this jersey, it means something so much different. And the first in the, in the book that I wrote the one of the proudest moments I had and One of the best cries are probably had in my entire life, with scoring my first goal in Team USA.

Speaker 1

44:07

 And the name of the book is defining purpose, right?

Speaker 2

44:10

 Correct. Yeah. Defining purpose, my fight with all sort of crow.

Speaker 1

44:15

 — and people can find that on Amazon and it's awesome. So yeah, I mean it's That's Just Amazing. Just see making you never played hockey. I mean, yeah. E. You know, it's like and here I mean it's just incredible. You know, I guess there're some similarities between lacrosse and hockey, you know. But.

Speaker 2

44:43

 They tell me it made me.

Speaker 1

44:48

 Some bad habits, I guess. Yeah. I think I tried it on, like, roller hockey, like one time and I didn't move. I just tried to score a bunch of goals and I guess some people would say that's what I did in La Crosse to but anyway, so okay, I mean just mind-blowing like it's yeah. I mean the fact that like look I mean you didn't, you know, you didn't do anything per se to start this whole Health. It's not like you made a bad decision or were you know running in you know in the wrong crowd or something, and so I mean how do you look at all this looking back, you know, as far as this happening to you when you weren't necessarily making poor decisions.

Speaker 2

45:40

 I think the world offers a lot of opportunity that people don't really recognize. We get into the moments of our daily life that you just kind of move along and you don't think about it that much. And at any given time, we're all going to feel something. And in my story I don't the one thing I don't like is when people say like hey my story is nothing like yours. Your story is absolutely like mine the beat ability to withstand in the trauma that we feel in the day is its the same for everybody but different in way, it presents itself. Yeah, yeah. But I think what that what you do with that is always is the story that you're going to tell forever. I Ember, someone asks what's your what do you want to be as a teacher? And I said, I don't want, I don't want anyone that you don't have to say that Mr. Davies was my favorite teacher. But if they say there's a story where this teacher did something amazing or did something good or helped me in something, and that goes for, Grandmother tells their daughter, their daughter tells their kid. Uh-huh, just lived for four generations.

Speaker 1

47:01

 So, that's a great way to look at it.

Speaker 2

47:04

 So what is, what are you providing to the world that says, you know, Jamie I was here. Brian. I was here and it changed as a teacher. You would like to say you help everyone's life, right? But you truly make a difference. An Is make difference that you can Define with one or two, hmm. And if you have hit that one person, you have done your job. And so, I just get luckily, I might be a little bit better of a Storyteller and people can there's much more meat to my story, but everybody has their story. And I hope said that, that ability to overcome those obstacles. Never be afraid of an obstacle and keep Going because those goals that you set yourself. They wouldn't be goals. If there were an obstacles there they were just be things to do.

Speaker 1

48:02

 That's true. That is really. Yeah that's really good. Yes. So much I could kind of piggyback on there, but I am going to move on. WE I am just going to fire off a few rapid fire questions, then we will wrap it up our.

Speaker 2

48:17

 Way.

Speaker 1

48:19

 If you could go back and give your 18 year old self some advice, what would it?

Speaker 2

48:22

 Be? I have a rule that I never go never look back and change anything. Because okay look if you look back, that means you wish something else that.

Speaker 1

48:34

 Happened, right? That's a good point. All right. If you could have coffee, I don't know if you drink coffee, but if you could have coffee with any historical figure, who would it.

Speaker 2

48:45

 Be? That is a great one for the history teacher. It doesn't. Yeah, right. And they could be.

Speaker 1

48:53

 Alive today. It's, you know, it doesn't have to be your favorite person ever.

Speaker 2

48:57

 Definitely. Not my favorite person but Eisenhower. Okay, I love that WWII.

Speaker 1

49:02

 Are. There you go? I like it. If you were given ten million dollars tomorrow, what would you do with it?

Speaker 2

49:11

 Pay off a few bills.

Speaker 1

49:13

 There you go. Live by the.

Speaker 2

49:14

 Beach, and I know that I have a deal that if me and Brad and Ken's my old neighbors, if any one won the lottery, we'd buy a hockey rink in the other two would work for the one who won the.

Speaker 1

49:28

 Money. Nice. I love it. Let us see. Besides your own book. What is a book that you'd recommend for the audience?

Speaker 2

49:41

 Who there's a great one? It's about a Navy. SEAL, who overcame? I wish I remember the name of the right now. It's about a Navy SEAL who ever came to an issue with drugs and being a Reckless Youth to be a Navy. SEAL, you know, unfortunately or fortunately for, for us, in the world, didn't survive combat, but Man, I will look it up as we're.

Speaker 1

50:08

 Talking, sounds good. We can put in the show notes. Anything else you want to touch on that? We haven't.

Speaker 2

50:12

 Covered. No not particularly. I mean, I will, I will offer it if you ever want to Part 2. Yeah. Welcome telling this story, and then he because there's this is only the first five years of the, of the difficult, really, the first year of the difficulty, the story doesn't end it goes, it actually. Recently, I had a surgery to finally, hopefully finish everything six months ago. Oh, wow. So it's a, it has a lot of.

Speaker 1

50:47

 Appendices, right? Like I said, we don't pretend that your adversity is behind you for any of us. I mean, you're, that's like I said, that's the point of the show is we were never gone dealing with adversity and hardship and Challenge and that's the whole point of this show is to You inspire people, like you said, everyone's adversity looks different and look takes on a different form, but we all have it. And so, how are you going to deal with that? And so, yeah, you're not done with your adversity either, but I do think you have made a major shift mentally and you highlighted, a couple of key points over that process. At least the part of the process that we were able to cover today. So did you find the book?

Speaker 2

51:33

 Yeah, it's actually, as I was looking it up, it was a second. One, it's called brothers forever. The story about Travis Manion and Brendan Looney.

Speaker 1

51:41

 Okay, cool. Nice out to check that out. All right, if any of our listeners wanted to reach out to you Brian, how can they do so.

Speaker 2

51:50

 LinkedIn? Actually that's okay. One social media that I really kind of follow where I posted the videos and actually even YouTube, I will have the video up. I used to keep that video that I sent you on a private line. But it's about time they release it to the world.

Speaker 1

52:09

 So nice. Yeah, we will have to put that in the show notes as well link to that video. That was really good. It's like 17. 18 minutes. Yeah, very inspiring. So I really need that.

Speaker 2

52:20

 In my, in my email address. I will give it out to. Everybody is just Ryan Davies. 36 at gmail. So.

Speaker 1

52:26

 Perfect. Awesome. Well again, Brian. Yeah, we will have to have you back on if you're good with it. It's I know there's a ton, we didn't cover and I just want to thank you once again for coming on and being open and sharing, you know, not sharing something. That's not that easy to talk about. I would imagine and, and trying to help our listeners benefit. So thanks a lot Brian. Really appreciate your time.

Speaker 2

52:53

 No, it's thank you for the form. Its, I think what you're doing is, is truly something that I think the world needs to hear more of. And because when you, when you hear about adversity and an abundance, it's there's not a singular definition to what abundance looks like and I thought, what you're doing is amazing and please keep it up by you have an.

Speaker 1

53:15

 Avid listener now? Thanks, Brian. I appreciate that. And I do, you know, we are trying to grow The Listener base and support to listeners out there. Look I am not super salesy but I want you all to share the episode, share it with your friends, share it with your family, give us a, you know, five star review. If you think that's an Applicable would love to grow The Listener base and trying to impact, as many people, as we can in a positive way. Some of our episodes are more real estate Finance business focused. Obviously this one wasn't and but this is, this is, I mean, this has been fantastic. I mean, we're all humans, and so I think everyone can relate to a lot of this, this episode. So, thanks again, Brian, really appreciate it. And to the listeners out there, thanks a lot for spending your most valuable resource with us, which is your Time. Thanks, everyone. Take care. Thanks so much for tuning in to this episode of the form adversity to abundance podcast.

Speaker 2

54:14

 If you're enjoying the show, please feel free to rate.

Speaker 1

54:17

 Subscribe and leave a review wherever you listen to your podcasts, that helps others find the show, and we greatly appreciate it. Thanks again for listening, and we will catch you in the next episode.